Beloved Partnership is a new (actually, original) paradigm of intimate human relationships that moves beyond what we have most commonly experienced in our lifetimes (romantic love, convenience or co-dependency) and toward interdependency and Trinitarian co-creation. It is the partnership that I believe was modeled by Mary Magdalene and Jesus.
Beloved Partnership – Not the same as soulmates or twin flames
I feel it is necessary to acknowledge that the Beloved Partnership differs in many regards from what we have come to understand about soulmates or twin flames. There are many experts on these two topics and I will permit their teachings to speak for themselves. In my personal experience, I have many soulmates – people I have known on a very deep and ancient level from the moment we first met. In the company of my soulmates, I always feel safe, supported and loved without condition. Twin flames, in my experience, are those who are here to be a mirror – helping us (sometimes painfully) to see all the areas in our lives in need of healing, and transformation. From Twin flames, I might proclaim, “Thank you sir/madame, may I have another!?” To a soulmate I might utter a sigh of deep contentment. While there are no hard and fast lines between soulmates, twin flames or Beloved Partnerships and all may share similar characteristics, in my experience Beloved Partnerships are markedly different.
Beloved Partnership/True One
The Beloved Partnership is what I describe at length in my recent novel,Song of the Beloved – the Gospel According to Mary Magdalene. I have also seen a close approximation to what I have come to understand about Beloved Partnership in what Solara refers to as our “True One.” By whatever name you call it, Beloved Partnership is unlike anything we have experienced in our lifetimes (there are some who have experienced this, but up until this time, this has been a rarity). While our fairytales and myths (including most Hollywood movies) hint at Beloved Partnership, they have only just skimmed the surface of the depth of love promised in these kinds of relationships. Unlike the romantic/co-dependent love favored in myth and fairytale (looking for the person outside of us who will complete us), Beloved Partnership is only possible when two COMPLETE individuals come together in a loving and intimate partnership (note: some relationships are able to evolve into a Beloved Partnership if this is the call of the relationship and if each individual works toward achieving this level of intimacy). Unlike soulmate relationships which are often platonic, Beloved Partnership is a love that includes intimacy, passion and a deep and abiding romantic love that grows beyond eros to include filios, pragma and agape. Also unlike most romantic relationships that we simply fall into (falling in love), Beloved Partnerships begin with a call – a call that is as deep as it is ancient – calling us back (ultimately) to the original nature and vision for human love.
Call of the Beloved
The call of the Beloved begins with just this – a call. For some, this call arrives in a dream. For others, it shows up in a meditative vision. For all, the call of the Beloved is experienced as a DEEP knowing – a knowing that abides in spite of all arguments against it or doubt around its truth. One just KNOWS there is someone they are supposed to be with (remember, this is not a co-dependent drive, seeking outside of us for something to fill the emptiness inside….it is a KNOWING of an ancient and divinely ordained truth) and they won’t stop until that relationship is realized. Ultimately, the call of the Beloved arises out of the imprint of the Soul. The Soul is the part of us that knows our highest truth, our path, our mission, our purpose in this world and compels us to fulfill this purpose. If part of that mission is Beloved Partnership, the Soul lets us know this and drives us to seek it out. Faith is the energy that propels this search and keeps us on the path until it is fulfilled. It is also faith that will not allow us to settle for anything less than what the Soul knows, and if we try to satisfy that call with something less than the true Beloved Partner, our Soul will pull the rug out from beneath our feet or kick our butts to prevent us from accepting anything other than the Beloved Partner. And if we have settled, we won’t be happy in the settling as the Soul will continue to hound us until we are united with the Beloved Partnership we were meant to experience in this life.
My Own Call
For me, the call of the Beloved Partner began in a deep knowing that has been present within me my whole life. The call then came with a vengeance while participating in a guided meditation where I was shown the eyes of my Beloved Partner and through his eyes I saw LOVE for the first time and felt myself held in a deep and intimate adoration. Since that glimpse, my Beloved Partner has shown up in dreams, meditations, waking and sleeping visions. I often feel his (almost literal) presence beside me – simply holding space, urging me on, calling me forth. I sense that he is having a similar experience, wherever he is at. I have also had no fewer than ten psychics tell me “He is right here. He is searching for you. He is doing his own work so that when you are both together, you will find each other.” One of my dearest friends and both of my sisters have dreamed of him. They all report the same – a man who will be my equal, my partner, my Beloved and who loves and adores me beyond measure (and I will regard him in the same way), and we will KNOW each other. They also have seen him as a co-creator – a partner in a shared mission and purpose. I feel, and they all agree (psychics, friends, sisters) that in our partnership one+one=infinity.
But First, It’s Time to Clean House
All that being said, I must acknowledge what has been true for me and what I believe must be true for all called to a true and authentic Beloved Partnership. As long as we are looking outside of ourselves for someone to complete us, the Beloved Partnership is not possible. Beloved Partnership is NOT co-dependency. Yes, relationships entered into initially from a place of co-dependency can evolve into a Beloved Partnership, but if Beloved Partnership was not the Soul’s intention for that relationship in the first place, it cannot be forced (believe me, I have tried). Instead, the call of the Beloved Partnership comes first TO WAKE US UP – to wake us up to our Soul and to invite us on a journey toward wholeness. Whether we are single or in a relationship, when the call of the Beloved arrives, we first have to tend to the calling of our Soul and that often means cleaning house. We have to do the dirty work of clearing our own patterns of co-dependency and begin the process of reclaiming all the parts of our Soul that we have lost along the path of our life’s journey. We have to reclaim who we really are and become whole, content, satisfied in ourselves as an individual. In this, we have to become well-acquainted with longing (the call of the Beloved Partner causes DEEP longing within us) and learn how to be present to this longing without seeking outside of ourselves for its remedy. We also have to learn how to be comfortable in being alone. If we make friends with our longing and learn to be content in being alone, the doors open to the Beloved Partner’s arrival.
Filling the Void vs. Wanting to Share
An important distinction in the Beloved Partnership is that we are not seeking this partner to fill a void or because we are afraid to be alone. Instead, the Beloved Partnership arises out of a content and whole individual who is happy to be alone, but who really wants to share their life, their mission, their purpose and their passion with another. In the Beloved Partnership, there is an exponential effect in these two whole individuals coming together. Instead of 1+1=2, they experience 1+1= infinity. While both partners are magnificent, effective, purposeful on their own, when their energies come together in co-creative partnership, the universe explodes with consequence. Their coming together creates an effect that is far beyond what each of them individually could accomplish….this is because it is not just themselves who are working – it is God working through them.
I’m not making this up!
In exploring the topic of Beloved Partnership, it is helpful to know that we are not the first to entertain this ideal of love. I personally believe this is the kind of loving relationship God envisioned in the first place and what was “supposed” to have happened between the metaphorical Adam and Eve. I believe that this is the kind of love ideal envisioned by the Christian Church is designating matrimony as a sacrament. Eastern spiritual traditions depict this kind of love in their Divine partnerings: Shiva and Shakti, Sita and Ram, Krishna and Radha, Babaji and Mataji. I believe this is the love experienced between Jesus and Mary Magdalene and which was unfortunately written out of the Christian story in favor of a patriarchal, hierarchical institution.
In modern literature, we have the writings of Abraham Maslow and Barbara Marx Hubbard to support us in honoring the inner call to the Beloved Partnership. The love of a Beloved Partnership is what Abraham Maslow referred to as “Self-actualized love.” Love between self-actualized individuals, as Abraham Maslow discovered (Motivation and Personality, 1970, pp. 181- 202), is the healthiest and most fulfilling kind of love. If we are willing to persist until we meet our Beloved Partner, this is what we might expect:
- A partnership where there is a mutual giving and receiving of love, both parties are equally able and willing to engage in both giving and receiving.
- A healthy sexuality rooted in and reflective of love – more creative, ecstatic, orgasmic and fulfilling, yet also less about attachment. It is not a needy kind of intimacy, but instead is mutually fulfilling.
- Pooling of needs – your needs, wants, desires, become mine and visa versa – such that there becomes one hierarchy of needs with two people seeking after their fulfillment.
- Fun, merriment, joy, spontaneity, elation, feelings of well-being.
- Mutual honor and respect of the other’s individual gifts, talents, drive, passions, interests, temperament, etc.
- Mutual, authentic admiration, wonder and awe.
- Detachment and Individuality – able to be in relationship without compromising one’s own individuality.Barbara Marx Hubbard sees the Beloved Partnership as what we are growing into as we evolve toward the next stage of human development as a co-creative society. In keeping with this vision, she calls the Beloved Partners The Co-Creative Couple (Conscious Evolution, 2015, pp. 238 – 239). She envisions the co-creative couple as follows:Now we become the cocreative couple, which begins when both partners achieve within themselves at least the beginning of a balance between the masculine and feminine, the animus and the anima. It begins when the woman’s initiative and vocational need is received in love by the feminine receptivity of her partner. When she is loved for her more masculine side, she falls in love with the man’s feminine aspect, for what she needs is the nurturance of her own strength and creativity. She loves him for his receptivity. He no longer has to prove himself by control and domination. He can bring forth his own creativity without aggression. And she can express her strength without fear of losing him. Whole being joins with whole being, recreating the family at the next stage of evolution. Same-sex couples experience a similar process of integration and joining to emancipate each other (p. 238).I am humbled and honored to be one among many who have been given a vision and a call to uphold the Beloved Partnership as the ideal of love we are evolving toward and one among many who is called to be a pioneer in anchoring this new (original) kind of love for humanity.
The Co-Creative Couple
Barbara Marx Hubbard sees the Beloved Partnership as what we are growing into as we evolve toward the next stage of human development as a co-creative society. In keeping with this vision, she calls the Beloved Partners The Co-Creative Couple (Conscious Evolution, 2015, pp. 238 – 239). She envisions the co-creative couple as follows:
Now we become the co-creative couple, which begins when both partners achieve within themselves at least the beginning of a balance between the masculine and feminine, the animus and the anima. It begins when the woman’s initiative and vocational need is received in love by the feminine receptivity of her partner. When she is loved for her more masculine side, she falls in love with the man’s feminine aspect, for what she needs is the nurturance of her own strength and creativity. She loves him for his receptivity. He no longer has to prove himself by control and domination. He can bring forth his own creativity without aggression. And she can express her strength without fear of losing him. Whole being joins with whole being, recreating the family at the next stage of evolution. Same-sex couples experience a similar process of integration and joining to emancipate each other (p. 238).
I am humbled and honored to be one among many who have been given a vision and a call to uphold the Beloved Partnership as the ideal of love we are evolving toward and one among many who is called to be a pioneer in anchoring this new (original) kind of love for humanity.
For more on the journey from “you complete me” to Beloved Partnership, read my book, Happily Ever After. Available on Amazon HERE.